[Verse 1]
I just really hate your face
Though I know that won’t surprise you
But, to me, your skin is one giant wart
And your laugh’s one big snort
And you stink, so, in short, I despise you
You disgrace the human race
‘Cause you’re more of a mosquito
I would rather have the dentist and drill
Then this swine in the swill
And if you were a bill, I would veto

[Chorus]
And if the world was perfect
You would be gone without a trace
But since the world could never be that great
I’ll just hate your stupid face

[Post-Chorus]
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Oh no...

[Verse 2]
I just really like your face
You don’t have to look so happy!
I’m not really into love that you flaunt
In some glittery font
But if that’s what you want
Make it snappy!
I just feel so out of place
Well, except for when you’re near me
When you’re gone, I’m like a plant with no root
Or a song that’s on mute
Don’t you dare call it cute!
You should fear me!

[Chorus]
And if the world was perfect
You would have never invaded my space
But since the world’s obsessed with saying “psych!”
Now I like your stupid face

[Post-Chorus]
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo

[Verse 3]
I just really miss your face
Though, by now, I must disgust you
I had tried to be the stubbornest mule
‘Cause I knew life was cruel
So I guess I was foolish to trust you
But I wait here, just in case
Though I know I’m being senseless
How could I have ever been so naive
And wear my heart on my sleeve
When I knew it would leave me defenseless

[Chorus]
And if the world was perfect
You would be here in my embrace
But since the world denied me one last kiss
I’ll just miss your stupid face

[Post-Chorus]
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo...

[Spoken]
“What are you doing here?”
“I didn’t run away! …It was a strategic retreat.”
“What is there to talk about? It’s over—I ruined it.”
“Well yeah, of course I’m sorry, but—”
“No—no, don’t forgive me! Why do you do that? Why give me another chance to mess things up?”
“Because you WHAT?!”

[Bridge]
Those three little words
Out of the blue
Completely uncalled for
Especially from you
Why don’t you hate me?
Why do you care?
Can’t you berate me? Isn’t that fair?
Where is your glare?
Don’t you dare leave our problems and pain on the shelf!
Because if you don’t hate me, I can’t hate myself
But that’s why I need you
You shatter my fear
‘Cause despite my misdeed
You are still right here
Though it’s stupid to date me
You’re willing to try
And if you don’t hate me
Then why should I?

[Spoken]
“Are you sure you don't want to give up on me?”
"You're a moron...”

[Verse 4]
So you think that we could work?
Here I thought I’d been the dumb one
("What?") You’re forgiving me for all I did wrong
You’re unmuting the song
And again, I belong to someone
You can drop the stupid smirk
Though, by now, I guess you’ve earned that
‘Cause no matter how intensely I pout
Your stupid face will win out
And I guess it’s about time I learned that

[Chorus]
And though we go together like a Chanel No.5 and mace
At least it’s not as dull as fitting like a glove
‘Cause you’re a nightmare that I’ve not been dreaming of
But I suppose that when push comes to shove
("Fine.")
I love your stupid face

[Post-Chorus]
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo

[Outro]
Your stupid face…