Former Kerry defender Aidan O'Mahony has revealed how the fallout from the Donncha O'Connor incident and the asthma related failed drugs test in 2008 impacted his psyche.
Five-time All-Ireland winner O'Mahony, who has now released an autobiography entitled 'Unbroken', spoke to Game On on RTÉ 2fm about how the aftermath of both events from the 2008 campaign impacted him over the subsequent years.
The Rathmore and Kerry player was heavily criticised following the 2008 All-Ireland semi-final replay victory over Cork, when Donncha O'Connor was sent off after an altercation.
The cameras captured a close up of O'Mahony and O'Connor squaring up at a break in play, the Cork corner forward administering a mild cuff on the cheek in response to provocation, the Kerry defender failing to react for a second before theatrically hitting the deck.
Elevated to pantomime villain status in the aftermath, O'Mahony acknowledges there "is no part in the GAA or sport" for feigning an injury but insisted the incident didn't define his long inter-county career.
"I was totally responsible for it myself. It was embarrassing for myself, it was embarrassing for my family," O'Mahony told Game On.
"When you're in the public eye, as a Garda, number one, you're never away from people. You're always going to be meeting people.
"For me, there is no part in GAA or sport for that behaviour, feigning an injury. In Kerry, football is a religion. You grew with some of the tales of the Kerry golden years, all these guys and what they gave for Kerry football.
"When something like that happens, sympathy is in short supply. It was tough. I was the one who caused the whole thing but at the same time, trying to move on from something like that, that moment didn't define my 13 or 14 years in a Kerry jersey.
"From a young age I was a total introvert. I'd keep myself to myself. I'd say people thought I was a strange personality, or very deep. I was one of these people who never dealt with anything, whether I was on the pitch or off the pitch.
"I always had this perception of myself that I had this that people had this kind of mindset that, 'aw he's teak tough on the pitch'. I thought then that I had to be that person.
"I thought if I talked about my issues or my challenges it would be seen as a weakness. That was a kind of template I followed from a young age when I was dealing with the asthma, or dealing with mental health.
"I thought I couldn't I couldn't talk about it - it would have been a stigma, that it would have been a weakness and I just let the whole thing snowball into something I couldn't deal with."
In what was a tumultuous finish to the season, O'Mahony then failed a routine drugs test after Kerry's loss to Tyrone in the All-Ireland final.
O'Mahony had tested positive for the use of the banned substance salbutamol. It was later ruled that the failed test was consistent with O'Mahony's treatment for asthma. Suffering from the flu in the lead-up to the final, O'Mahony had taken between eight and ten puffs on his inhaler.
"The inhaler thing was something that totally floored me," the player recalls.
"The media ran with the story: 'O'Mahony fails drugs test'. That's a great thing for people to beat you with a stick especially after the Donnacha O'Connor incident.
"As I said, sympathy was in very short supply. So, when that happened, I found I was getting messages and people were sending stuff to me house in Cork. In some sense, people knew it was something to do with an inhaler but it obviously wasn't a good enough story. People tried to put a different spin on it.
"I found those three or four months very tough. Every day, every week you're trying to give your side of the story to people. People you'd talk to would have no interest. They just wanted to hear the darker side of it. A of it totally drained me and I think it drained my love for the sport I grew up on. It changed my personality a lot.
"The amount of messages I got from people who have asthma and whatnot was frightening. They were saying, you're here having to explain yourself in front of a committee with a two-year ban hanging over you'. When it finished with... I just found I had an awful dislike and hate for GAA."
O'Mahony retired from inter-county football in early 2017 after 13 years playing for Kerry, winning five All-Ireland titles, picking up two All-Stars (2006, 2007) and earning the Man of the Match award in the 2006 All-Ireland final.
